Part IV — “Do not teach others how to live your life.” – A Reflection

This is a quote from Akiane found on page 121 of her book of poems titled My Dream Is Bigger Than I – Memories of Tomorrow – Part IV marking the next series of poetry written by Akiane at the tender age of 10…This quote is very profound and what comes to my mind as the reader of these poems and the author of these reflections is this: Many of us particularly in the western world are conditioned to have certain expectations of both ourselves and others…Certain courtesies are expected such as polite smiling and holding the door for others when possible…I do these little things myself because I like to treat others with great respect and the way I would like to be treated…Respect has to be earned so does trust…However common decency should always prevail even when faced with rotten behavior from others…We must constantly make choices and the average person makes many choices both big and small throughout the day…Do we retaliate when another person is horrible or do we take the higher road and not feed the cycle of negative horrible bad behavior…If you have ever been glared at by a total stranger I know I have experienced this the thing to do is to totally ignore these glares unless you know someone above that person to address the problem…The best thing to do is to simply ignore this…I was on a public bus in Turkey with my then ten year old son and a young man young enough to my son but older than my child…Was glaring at me like he wanted to devour me…I never experienced that type of aggression in a glare before…This was new and terrifying for me…So I stared out the window the whole time and my son sitting next to me kept an eye on that young man…By the time it was time for us to get off at our stop the young man had stopped glaring…I was very grateful because I was terrified…If he tried to speak to me if he knew English I would have shouted “you are not my husband do not speak to me!”…That is what women must do in Muslim countries like Turkey because Muslim men are normally very respectful and would not glare at a woman as a mark of respect…To glare or stare is a mark of disrespect in the Muslim world and in most cultures…In Muslim countries if a woman returns the glare or stare for too long this is also a mark of disrespect and could borrow trouble for that woman…When stared at or glared at the thing to do is avert your eyes look away up or down and do not stare or glare back…While this may seem like submission it is best for women to be submissive unless a physical attack is eminent then aggression is called for where you match that glare with a fiery glare of your own and you fight to the death…While one of you might end up dead a woman who can fight has a fighting chance whereas women not trained to fight don’t have a hope in hell as they are not fit for the task and western women are either extremely aggressive gun toting gals or the opposite very timid not able to defend themselves at all…Finding a balance is the key…I believe every woman should be trained to fight and how to use guns including machine guns…These are the times we are living in…Women need to learn how to fight and how to disarm scumbag attackers then use their weapons on them if necessary…If someone is going to die it better be the attacker because many women will not go down without a fight to the death…When you get to the point when you do not care whether you live or die…Then you will get the courage you need to fight for what you believe and fight for what is right…Courage is built over years of hard work and the school of hard knocks and training…The days are gone when men defend women while it is true there remains many good men who do defend women and children you do not see that happening as much anymore…Now women must learn to fight and take up arms including machine guns and fight when called to the task…Military training is very beneficial and every man and woman should have some form of military training…The discipline learned from military training is very valuable as is the mental toughness that comes with military territory…When faced with the enemy your military training takes over and you do what you have to do because if someone is going to die it better be your enemy…To live our lives we must learn how to be whole in an of ourselves whole persons our own universe…So that when you are at work or at home you add something you bring something to the table or desk…When you are a whole person you can be trusted and you do not gossip because gossip is for the feeble minded for the weak who cannot control their own insecure tongues…There is a saying that goes like this “loose lips sink ships”…This is very true successful people don’t have time for useless talk or useless gossip they are too busy leading successful lives…Gossips try to teach others how to live their lives after all these talking heads do is blather on and on about their own lives and other people’s lives…That is because these gossips who are married or single are too lazy to care for the families they already have and prefer to meddle in other people’s business because they are miserable and love to make other people miserable…So instead of teaching others how to live your life be the best you that you can be and teach others how to live life more fully by being the best whole person the best unique universe that you can be….The photograph I choose for this reflection is of Down Patrick Head in Ireland…An amazing scenic spot with a spectacular view of the Atlantic Ocean…The image you see here has a glass protection because the story goes that a mother who was not well committed suicide and jumped off that ledge with her children…I would say that is true because suicides are rampant around the world because many have forgotten how to cope…It matters not what our status is the ability to cope is the best gift we could ever receive because without resilient coping skills many are lost to suicide and many like that mother drag others to their death in the process…Families who suffer the loss of loved ones to suicide are at great risk for losing other loved ones to suicide…The thing to do is to be strong and stay strong and no matter what no matter how big or small your life is…Every life matters…Black Lives Matter!!! Native American Lives Matter!!! Irish Lives Matter!!! South American Lives Matter!!! Canadian Lives Matter!!! Every life from every nation every island across the breath of the earth matters!!! Sorry I cannot list all the unique nations here…Every life matters!!!…In the eyes of our creator the God of life no life is too big or too small and when we die we all become homeless on earth without any material value save our souls set to go to heaven or sent to hell depending on how we live our lives on earth…Every life matters including nature the life of our plants our trees our flowers our ecosystems our animals…I say our not to suggest that we own these lives rather to be inclusive for we are all connected in this mighty frame…Therefore all of our lives matter!!!…As a thank you for reading this reflection enjoy my song that I wrote titled it matters…It matters when we falter and it matters when we fail…There are times when saying sorry is too late because the faltering should not have happened in the first place…For all who have experienced vile gossip and vile betrayal from false friends who are wolves in sheep’s clothing…This reflection is for you…